Sweet, Clean and Wholesome Romance

If you’ve read romance at all, then you know navigating heat levels within the genre can be a challenge. There’s nothing like picking up a book that looks like a sweet romantic comedy and then having your retinas seared off by an unexpected sexy scene. So how do you know which books to pick to prevent sore eyeballs? What is the difference between sweet, clean, or wholesome romance?

Sweet and Wholesome

People sometimes use the titles 'sweet' and 'wholesome' synonymously.. And most of the time, that’s ok. Sweet and wholesome romances have little physical interaction between the main character (MC) and their love interest (LI). Think Hallmark movie level heat - maybe holding hands, maybe a brief hug or a cuddle, and usually a kiss or two and that’s about it. The story concentrates strongly on the mental and emotional bonding between the couple.

The fundamental difference between sweet and wholesome, in my experience, is religious vs. secular. This is an unofficial designation, observed when reading the different romances available. 

Wholesome tends to be the more religious type romances. It could be overt, like being categorized as a Christian romance. Or it could be more subtle, like the people in the story don’t live together before marriage. They might pray or drink alcohol only at dinner or on special occasions.

Sweet, on the other hand, is more secular. They won’t concentrate on religious themes or standards. The story focuses on the common relationships found in everyday life. They keep swearing and violent themes to a minimum. Usually none.

Also, sweet romances can include LGBTQ+ themes, where wholesome probably won’t.

Clean Romance

Clean romance can include any and all of the above. Fade-To-Black or Closed-Door romance are other ways to identify a clean romance. Clean romance means that there will be kissing, hugging, cuddling, feelings, touching, and fading to the next scene when the clothes start to come off. Or mostly off. One or two might have come off. But there are no focused descriptions of body parts or the reactions said body parts are having, or what those body parts might be doing.

There are also different spice levels within the clean romance genre as well. My daughter and I came up with the following designations:

• Peppy - Pretty much on the same level as sweet, but maybe there was a bit more touching or kissing than grandma might be comfortable reading.

• Tangy - Deep kissing, some touchy-touching without getting too descriptive, a bit more descriptive of feelings and the character’s reactions to physical interactions with their LI. Maybe light making out. 

• Zesty - All the above with some clothing removal, heavy necking or making out, but right before things get ‘interesting’, they close the door and the scene cuts to the aftermath.

Sweetwater and Ophelia are Zesty, while Rose (on Kindle Vella) is Peppy. My rule of thumb is that once things head south of the collarbone, I cut to the next scene. I also don’t do moaning, screaming, or rubbing.

Clean tends to be more LGBTQ+ friendly than the other two. Most queer friendly novels are probably going to be in the Spicy and up categories, if it’s a book for adults. However, plenty of YA novels have been published in the last decade or so that can give you both a clean and queer book to read.

Clean can also mean more serious subject matter than sweet or wholesome. Men aren’t always nice and respectful. Bad things besides bakeries shutting down can happen. Harder decisions besides “Do I go back to the big city or stay in the small town?” have to be made. Swear words or violence are not showcased, but can still be there. In Sweetwater, one theme of the book is war-related PTSD. Not generally something you’d see on Hallmark.

Cozy

I thought I’d give an honorable mention to the term cozy, in case you didn’t know what that meant. Usually used regarding mysteries, but I’ve also seen cozy horror as well. The characters in the novel usually reference the violence instead of describing it in detail. In horror, the best example I can give is Goosebumps but for adults.

Cozy also doesn’t have a lot of sex or swearing as well.

How Can I Tell?

Unfortunately, there is no surefire way of being able to tell if a romance falls within your particular comfort level. Here are a few ways I recommend vetting the book before you buy it:

• No chesticles on the cover - if there’s a shirtless guy (or girl) on the cover, then you’re likely to have picked up a spicy or smutty novel. They don’t call ‘em bodice-rippers for nothing.
• Read the reviews - some covers, especially in the romantic comedy genre, can be deceiving. The trend right now is to have bubblegum-bright covers with cute, illustrative people. But then when you read it, there are romps in the hay all over the place. Look at the reviews for the book on Goodreads or Bookbub. People should give you a pretty good idea at spice level.

Where Do I Find Good Books?

Again, there is no definitive way to screen your books, but here are some additional ideas for finding good books:

• Search Filters on Book Retailers - not the most reliable way to filter books, but it is a way. You might use keywords like ‘sweet romance’ ‘wholesome romance’ ‘clean romance’ ‘Christian romance’ or ‘sweet and wholesome.’ Particularly for the latter keyword, since no other genre uses that keyword, except maybe women’s fiction.

• Social Media - again, keywords are important, particularly if you’re going to be searching Instagram, YouTube or TikTok. There are huge book communities on these platforms. Using the above referenced keywords can help you find like-minded readers and authors in the genre you want to read.

• Facebook Groups - there are a ton of Facebook groups that cater specifically to these kinds of books. Just search for clean romance and you should find a bunch.

• Newsletters - some authors like to take part in book recommendation swaps on their newsletter, or they like to do book reviews. In my newsletter, I try to have at least three or more book recs from other authors writing the same kinds of books I do. Search for book recs in your favorite author's newsletter.

I get it. It’s hard to find good reads nowadays. It seems the spicy and smutty kinds of romance have the loudest presence in retail stores and online communities. I’m not passing judgment on people who like to read the smut and the spice. I’m someone who prefers to read things I wouldn’t be ashamed to let my teenage daughter read. So I understand how hard it is to find a balance between swoony and smutty when the publishing industry has no classification system to alert us. I hope this helps you find a book that you can read without having to cover grandma’s eyes or straining your eyebrows.

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What is the best place to find sweet, clean and wholesome books that you've found?

Tag me with @passableprose on your social media to let me know your answer.

Happy Reading!

Summer Sun and Writing

Summer is in full swing at my house. The weather has improved, school is out. We’re sleeping in, and getting out and about. And accomplishing some goals before the school year starts again. Things I didn’t have time for, or the weather didn’t permit. I'm aiming to write away from my house. Reading more is a priority. And I’m working on finishing up some books that have been on the back burner.

Read and Write Outside

My new house has a small patio area that I plan to use to the max this summer. My neighborhood is pretty quiet and I’ve always loved the sound of kids playing outside. I’ll get some patio furniture-a table for my laptop and a comfy chair for reading. I’ll get a healthy dose of Vitamin K and D and it will be nice to be present in my neighborhood.

I want to get out more in my community. I become quite the hermit during the winter. I'll write outside my house once a week. One good place I’ve found is my local library. I can drop my youngest off at the local pool and spend an hour or two amongst books. Our local library doesn’t allow food or drink. Our local tabletop game store, Game Haven, is a pleasant alternative when I need my Liquid Fortification and a snack. And the proprietor lets me stay as long as I want. As long as there’s not a tournament.

Utah is fantastic for its outdoor spaces. I haven’t enjoyed them much since some life-changing events in the last couple of years. We have a cute little canyon with dry riverbeds and picnic tables with fire pits. I’d have my laptop while birds chirp and the wind rustles the leaves in the trees. My kids get to go crazy running around the woods.

Read More Books

I’ve been slacking on the reading front as well. I rarely have a lot of time to sit down and read a physical book anymore. So I splurged with a Scribd* subscription this year. And I have been loving it. 

My only complaint is their search feature makes it very hard to find clean romance. It will bring up some suggestions. But sometimes Scribd has books misclassified as “sweet romance” where it’s anything but. Of course, the first hint the book probably isn’t ‘sweet’ is naked chesticles hanging out right on the cover.

I’ve also wanted to find more indie authors who write clean and sweet romance. It’s important to me and to those authors that I find and support them, read their books and leave reviews. It’s so important to an author, especially indie ones, for the reviews. I’m making connections with these kinds of authors through Story Origin. You’ll see suggestions for these authors if you sign up for my monthly newsletter.

Finish More Books

The period that my life was in upheaval was the most creatively prolific I’ve ever been. I have several books already in finished first draft form that I’d love to get to in the coming years. A couple are closer to release than others. I aim to get at least two done before the end of the year.

Ophelia - Book two in the Sweetwater Saga, I’m about halfway into the restructuring editing I’d been working on the last couple of months. I can finish it for fall release now that school is done. I’m so excited for everyone to see it. If you read it on Wattpad, where I first released it, it was very rough. VERY rough. Still readable, but I’m sure it left many people feeling like something was missing. I feel I’ve fixed most of it, and you’ll fall in love with Ophelia and Justin as I have.

Zoe - Yes! There is a book three in the Sweetwater Saga. I'm a quarter of the way through the first draft. This is the story of Anna and Phillip’s daughter, Zoe, now that she’s graduated from high school. Then she discovers that college is not nearly as challenging as dealing with your love life when you’re just becoming an adult.

Daughter of Witches - I mention this one only because it’s going to take up a lot of my time over the next year. It’s a romantic fantasy set in a might-have-been Ireland and Scotland. I have a few scenes already written for the four-book series. I’m sure you can appreciate that it’s going to be a while before it’s available. But it’s what I’m working on currently, both developmentally and writing-wise, that I’m sure I’ll talk about more in the future.

I have lots to do and a small amount of time to get them done. Subscribe to my newsletter for book updates. And in return, I’ll send you a Sweetwater short story about Anna and Phillip. Here’s to the sun, summer and all the writing!

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What kinds of activities do you plan to get done this summer?

Tag me in your social media with your response!

Happy Reading!

* I am not affiliated with Scribd for this recommendation.

Why I Chose to Self-Publish

Self-publishing for my books was a conscious choice, not a back-up plan. Or at least it started out as a backup plan. Quickly, it became so much more than sloppy seconds. There was power in the control I had over every aspect of my book. There was the overlap of social media marketing necessary for my book that publishers would expect me to do anyway without their help. There was the ability to release books on my timetable, not theirs.

The dream of all new writers is to write a Great Novel, send it off to an agent or publisher. They adore the manuscript and a book contract is forthcoming. The writer rides off into the sunset as a newly minted author. But with Amazon, Ingram Spark, and others made it possible and convenient to release a book on your own. The old-school way-it-was pathways were no longer necessary.

Would I have published traditionally given a chance? Maybe. But as I’ll mention later, there were reasons for me not considering that route compared to the other options I already had. And I took the risk of standing or falling by my own choices. I was willing to take that risk.

Control at Every Point

This was the point of highest risk. Risk of your finances and sanity. It is insanely expensive to produce a book on your own. Especially if you want your book to be as good as a publishing house work. Little expenses (or big) add up fast. You need professional editing (multiple rounds), paperback and ebook formatting, cover design, and hard copy copies. Then there’s the marketing materials like bookmarks, stickers and business cards, website design and maintenance, copyright registration fees, and ISBN purchases. That doesn’t include any extras too numerous to list. 

As expensive as it is, every single bit of it is yours to design, approve, and release when you want. Sounds like a lot? It is. But I adore my beautiful covers because my cover designer and I worked together to make something I loved. If I ever want to change it, I get a new one made and attach it to the files already on Amazon or Ingram Spark. I don’t have to get anyone’s approval and I do it whenever I like.

I don’t write to the market. I write what speaks to me and make it available to people who might like it. I discovered that in the traditional publishing world, how well you wrote hardly mattered. Ok, it did matter, but it was a secondary consideration of what the be-alls of the publishing industry were looking for. They only invest in books they feel will sell well, while only offering a limited type of book for people to read. It didn’t necessarily reflect what the readers were reading or would read. Not to mention I wasn’t writing my books for wide audiences. I had something to say in a particular niche and it was one that agents and publishers weren’t buying. How do you compete against that?

You can’t.

Social Media Marketing Machine

One of the biggest letdowns about the traditional publishing industry was their change in marketing behavior. Thirty to fifty years ago, if you were lucky to get offered a publishing deal for your manuscript, then the publishing house took on most of the heavy lifting for marketing your book. The author could expect to do some book signings at local bookstores. If their book was popular enough, they might do some promotion tours.

That’s not the way it is anymore. Traditional publishers no longer handle marketing for the authors unless they are one of the top-tier monsters of the industry, like Steele, King or Sanderson. It’s actually written into the contract that the author will do a certain amount of marketing for their own book. The publishers limit their involvement to slapping a cover on it, printing a bunch and getting it in bookstores. Anyone can use Ingram Spark for the same thing.

Authors who have spent time trying to get attention for their book know it is a matted, twisted jungle out there. Hundreds of other authors are trying to do the same thing. But the publishing houses want to send you in with no water or machete. Good luck!

If you have to hack away at the jungle, you do your own research. And buy your own equipment so you have the right tools and supplies for the job. And a quick search on Pinterest or YouTube will bring up hundreds of resources teaching you how to navigate it all, most of them from other authors already doing it. 

My Timetable

I’ve spoken to other authors, so I know I’m not alone in this sentiment. You’ve put blood, sweat and tears into writing and editing a finished draft of your book. It is the best thing since Shakespeare and you can’t wait for everyone to read it. You’re sure it will be well-received if it's accessible.

Nope. One of the most disappointing aspects of the traditional publishing game was the time from finished draft to book on a shelf. Time wasted away waiting for responses to queries. Months and months would go by before you’d receive a “thanks, but no thanks” in your inbox. And then the process would start all over again with more queries sent. It seemed a colossal waste of hope, energy and precious time submitting to someone who probably didn’t even read the first page. 

And when authors got picked up, it was months and months of contract negotiations and approvals. Their books sat on a shelf waiting for its turn to be churned out of the publishing house machine, and before it was available on the bookstore shelves. That entire process can take upwards of a year and a half or more. All told, three years could pass before your book sees the light of day.

I control the timeline. All of the above steps of producing a book speeds up to weeks rather than years. On average it's taken about two months to get everything in place so I can start the marketing process for my book. Then another month or two for bare minimum marketing. That's a lot better wait than years.

Am I rolling in cash now that I’ve self-published my book? No. My book catalog contains two books right now–Sweetwater and Rose. My marketing efforts so far have been spotty at best. I don’t expect my books to have rocketed to the stratosphere. Not to mention the fact that disabled woman/able-bodied man romances, or inter-abled romances, are not exactly a hot ticket–yet. But Sweetwater has some excellent reviews and I’m preparing to release Ophelia by the end of the year. On my schedule.

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Do you find most of your books at the bookstore or online like Amazon?

Answer in your social media, and tag me to check it out!

Happy Reading!

Spotlight - Ophelia, a novel

 

My current edit-in-progress is my book Ophelia, book number two in the Sweetwater Saga that began with Anna and Phillip’s love story in Sweetwater. I had to re-write some of the beginning of the novel because there were some plot points that weren’t working. I really hate having to do nearly full re-writes, but it makes the story a lot better than the version on Wattpad.

When I wrote Sweetwater, Ophelia was just a spunky side character meant to spur Anna forward to considering taking Phillip seriously as a love interest. But she soon turned out to be a fan favorite amongst my Wattpad readers and so I started developing a story for her. Sweetwater hints at Ophelia’s past and her future as well. And I wanted to explore that, considering people just loved her sweet and loyal personality.

I love having face claims, pictures that represent the look of my characters I find on the internet, when I’m writing my stories. They give the characters a look and a personality. When I saw this picture of a cute blonde with pink ends to her hair, I KNEW she was Ophelia. The real girl is a Norwegian fashion blogger and cute in her own way, so I hope she doesn’t mind me stealing her look.

Some other inspiration was a character in the movie P.S. I Love You, the sister of the main character. Loyal, loving and a complete free-spirit, she inspired these important attributes that define Ophelia’s character.

Next, I had to flesh out Justin. My biggest question is what kind of guy would appeal to Ophelia? She has an unhealthy penchant for choosing the absolute wrong guy. Who could take her out of the singles pool for good?

Check out those baby blues. I knew immediately this was the kind of guy that would appeal physically to Ophelia. He was adorable, but in a non-muscle-head kind of way. He looked sweet, but not a pushover. He had to be opposite of Mike, the villain in the story, physically and in personality. Justin had to be romantic, thoughtful, know what he wants and confident in himself as a person. Justin needed to be the kind of guy willing to stand up for himself against Mike. He also needed to be the kind who avoided fights because he wanted to look masculine. His masculinity was a given because he didn’t need to prove it.

The relationship between Ophelia and Justin started out pretty straightforward. He adores her spunk, creativity and apparent love for life. She finds him adorkable, sweet and smart. But in real life, we all have hang ups. And in romance, those hang-ups so often trigger the hang ups in the person we’re interested in. In Justin and Ophelia’s case, we’re dealing with some very specific issues. Trust issues stemming from Justin’s childhood and feelings of inadequacies for Ophelia because of an incident that happened before Anna’s first husband, Darren, died.

One of the other themes I deal with in Ophelia is the subject of dating violence in relationships. No worries, it’s not about Justin. I wanted to show what breaking up with a narcissistic person looked like. I based Mike off of an experience a family member of mine dealt with when she broke up with one of her exes. You do not break up with a narcissist. They break up with you. And even when they do break up with you, you still belong to them. They honestly can’t handle you being with anyone besides them, even if they don’t want you anymore. This insecurity can lead them to do harmful things to their partners or former partners. As irrational as it seems, they feel justified in punishing former or current partners for the “sins” committed against them. I tried walking a fine line with this theme because I don’t want to glorify violence. There are too many romance novels out there right now that mesh sex and violence. I didn’t want to concentrate on that. To me, it’s not sexy for one partner to dominate the other even if the partner is willing. It’s just too close to the real thing for my comfort.

With all that said, I can’t wait to finish up Ophelia’s happily ever after. I may come close to her not getting it as I can, because I’m evil. It is, after all, a romance novel.

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What’s your favorite part of a romance novel? What part can’t you wait to get to?

Post it on your social media, and tag me to see it!

Happy Reading!